this heaviness…

Man, it’s been a heeeeeeeeeeavy last few weeks. And I know that I’m not the only one in the midst of a major life upheaval. I keep hearing it from friends, acquaintances, astrologists, and intuitives. We’re all going through some crazy shit right now.

And believe it or not… it’s all for our highest good.

We are seeing this energy manifest in SO many ways… from seemingly crappy issues, like relationship quarrels or broken-down cars, to exciting new adventures, like moving to a bigger place or accepting a position at a different company.

Just from my own household’s experience, I could name off at least nine life-changing events taking place at the moment.

What’s interesting (and maybe not surprising), there are two sides to each of these coins. There’s a good and a bad, a pro and a con, a light and a dark, an excitement and a fear…

But that’s how you know you’re on the right track.

Last week, we had TWO (not one) of our TWO cars decide that they didn’t want to start. In the same day. Within a few hours of each other.

That sounds kinda shitty, right?

Due to these inconveniences, we had to cancel appointments, push back plans, spend unbudgeted dollars, and check our bad attitudes.

It’s so easy to get stuck under the weight of unexpected events—especially when they have financial ramifications and force you to suddenly shift priorities.

The only way out of a disappointment spiral is to ask yourself a couple questions:

  1. Is there any value to my pout-pout face? (hint: the answer to this is always no.)
  2. Can I extract any positives from this situation? (spoiler: the answer to this is always yes.)

And of course, the follow-up to that second question is:

  1. What are the positives?

Well, in our bummer two-car-out-of-commission scenario, the positives included:

  • Being able to check out a cool shop downtown that I had been eyeing for awhile as we waited for AAA to arrive.
  • Realizing that we need to prioritize getting a new car sooner than later.
  • Replacing the SUV’s starter to keep us going until we find our next car.
  • Learning that the other car not only needed new tires, but also needed a new alternator (maybe. this is still unclear, as we have not gotten it to the shop yet.).
  • And finally, indirectly, these issues gave me the push to clear out enough space on one side of the garage for the SUV to fit. (The AC does not do a good job of getting to the back of the car, so being able to park it inside the garage—versus outside in the direct sun surrounded by 100-degree weather—has been a big life improvement.)

All that to say… we have a choice to make when life gets heavy.

We can let all the little details get bigger than they really are (oh, that mental self-fulfilling prophecy game we play).

Or we can remember this one simple concept: things happen FOR us, not TO us.

Instead of leaving “Why me?!” as a rhetorical question, try actually answering it. “Why me? Why did this happen? What is there for me to learn here? How can I make this work out in my favor?”

Or if you need it in the context of delicious flavor… “How can I make lemonade out of lemons?”

The Seine at Argenteuil by Claude Monet (painting of the vanilla sky in "Vanilla Sky")
The Seine at Argenteuil by Claude Monet (painting of the vanilla sky in “Vanilla Sky”)

And real talk: this shit is powerful. Being able to shift your perspective to where you can be back in control over your life is magical!

So, don’t waste the opportunity. And don’t forget what Jason Lee told Tom Cruise in “Vanilla Sky”: “The sweet is never as sweet without the sour.”

<3 Laura

Author: thatlaurainsley

current mood: Gratitude. | mama bear | intuitive writing | empath | crystal healing | living intentionally | rainbows | #bemorewithless | @laurainsleywriter | she.her | end scene.

3 thoughts on “this heaviness…”

  1. Well said. “What can I learn from this…” is my mantra in many difficult circumstances. One always has the personal power to make lemonade.

    1. That is amazing! And 100% agree. It’s not always easy to get our egos out of the way long enough to see the lesson in every circumstance. But the pay off is worth it. 💖

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