Category: depression

that effing groundhog…

Listen, I’m done.

It’s been 12 days since the first day of spring, and we’ve had more grey skies, snowfall, freezing rain, and hail than I care to tolerate.

As my almost-six-year-old just said, “I don’t get it. It says it’s spring, but it’s still cold.” Even she gets it.

As I’m sitting here at an Airbnb in Ketchum, Idaho, the snow continues to fall and stick to whatever it hits first. While I can’t deny how beautiful and magical a blanket of snow can be, it’s time to give the proverbial mic back to the sun.

Continue reading “that effing groundhog…”

sometimes you just need to word vomit…

Toward the end of last year, I was on a rollercoaster—a mental, emotional, and physically taxing rollercoaster. While my highs and lows may have been a result of (or at least exacerbated by) my pregnancy hormones, they were still very real. My condition, plus other situational factors, just amplified the issues and wounds that had been festering for awhile.

October was particularly difficult, and I started writing about it in my “october… (pt. one)” post. I had fully intended to publish a “part two,” but at the time, I didn’t have the strength or mental capacity to continue on with it.

I was stressed. I was drained. I was depressed.

Continue reading “sometimes you just need to word vomit…”

a journal entry…

12.28.22 10:55 a.m. (and updated 01.29.22 12:47 p.m.)

Yesterday, the sun came out for what seemed like the first time in weeks. It melted most (if not all) of the snow around our house. There’s something magical about snow—watching it swirl around in the outside air… and getting excited when it actually sticks to the ground. Even though it’s one of those beautiful miracles of nature, I needed that melt yesterday.

I was never really a big fan of cold weather anyway, and even less so now in my postpartum condition.

I was tired of the grey… tired of cold… just tired. I needed the sun, and the healing energy of its warmth.

Continue reading “a journal entry…”

october… (pt. one)

October was hard for me. From what I hear, I wasn’t alone.

Blood Moon Lunar Eclipse November 2022 - Total Lunar Eclipse - photo via Ed Piotrowski

And then there was a blood moon lunar eclipse on November 8. I don’t know about you, but I woke up with a sort of optimism that I hadn’t felt in awhile.

It was like a breath of fresh air.

Not gonna lie. I was worried there for a minute…

Continue reading “october… (pt. one)”