so many signs…

Alright, alright, alright… here I am again. Over the last several months, I’ve started drafting blog posts, but ultimately abandoned them. I let ego get in the way of putting out content. Instead of running to the computer as soon as an idea struck, or heck, even putting pen to paper and just getting something down, I would begin writing it in my head.

My mind would start asking those dumb questions, like “how much could you really write on that subject?” “who would care?” and “what’s the point?” After reading (okay, fine, listening to) Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert, I realized it was just my ego screwing things up for me. I was too hung up on what other people would think or what other people would get out of it.

Even after this realization, though, I still didn’t think about reviving the blog. Instead, I decided to focus on writing a book—the idea for which had been brewing over the last few years. So, the other night, I just started typing. It felt good, not gonna lie.

I didn’t get too far into it, but at least I had the start. I figured out, sort of organically, how I wanted each page to look and how I wanted the reader to take in the information. Small victories.

It’s not a totally happy topic for me to write about, but I think it’ll be more therapeutic than anything. And that’s the point of creative or recreational writing, right? Always write to satisfy yourself (in some way) and never only to please anyone else.

I digress.

So, why back to the blog? Well, after I finished Big Magic, I was going to start City of Girls by the same author. I even started (listening to) it, but it just didn’t feel right. ::nudge::

Something in me decided to search for audiobooks by Jen Sincero, author of You Are A Badass. I had already read YAAB (twice), but noticed there was another available release, You Are A Badass Every Day. I was skeptical about listening to a “companion” book, since it included various writing exercises. Nevertheless, I borrowed the audiobook from my library via the Libby app (GAME CHANGER, btw).

Wouldn’t you know it? Jen’s words were the clever kick in the ass inspiration I needed. Much of the advice she offered hit home for me. One nugget in particular is to follow through on your intuition. ::nudge::

Interestingly, I’ve been experiencing a lot of “coincidences,” lately. But I don’t believe in coincidences; everything’s connected. (See below The Blanket Truth scene from I Heart Huckabees. It’s science.)

And they’ve been happening so often that I can’t ignore them anymore. Which brings me back to the blog.

…finally, I know…

Yesterday morning, Caroline wanted to look at photos on my phone. Usually, I’d open up my phone’s photo album, but instead I opened up Instagram. (Backstory: She had been looking at my Instagram account on Collin’s phone only five minutes earlier, but he needed his phone back, so she picked up my phone to continue her perusal.)

As she scrolled the page, she would point to people and videos, ask questions, and comment. She happened to pause on the photo that accompanied my announcement of this blog. She asked what the photo was about. ::nudge::

Several hours later, I received a direct message via Instagram from someone (basically an extended family member) who has been in my peripheral lately. A few weeks ago, her Insta account recently popped up in my “maybe you wanna be friends with these peeps” feed, and the app wasn’t wrong. It’s been years since we’ve spoken, so why not connect now?

Fast forward to only a few days ago… she sent me a separate DM regarding the Turkish women’s rights campaign (you’ve seen the #challengeaccepted B+W selfies, right? Click this link for more education on the issue.). Well, in this new message, she offered kind words regarding my blog writing and wanted some advice. ::nudge::

Honestly, I was taken aback. Like, are sure you read my stuff? I shared her sweet note with Collin, to which he responded “Girl. This. Is. What. I’ve. Been. Saying.” ::nudge::

I had been ignoring these intuitive nudges, but I can’t anymore. One sign after another keeps slapping me in the face, and it’s time I finally stop pushing it aside and let it take me to wherever it’s going to take me.

Things happen for a reason. People cross your path for a reason. Maybe the “why” is not immediately obvious, but it’ll come. It always does.

So, uh, hey! Nice to see y’all again, and let’s make this a regular thing, yeah?

<3 Laura

Author: thatlaurainsley

current mood: Gratitude. | mama bear | intuitive writing | empath | crystal healing | living intentionally | rainbows | #bemorewithless | @laurainsleywriter | she.her | end scene.

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